A Shitty Week

Well guys and gals and mexicans, I present to you this week's shits - coming straight from my asshole. My body has been producing a lot of shit lately, and I'm very excited to share it with you.

Monday - The Fecal Fetus

It started off with some semi-diarrhetical turds exploding at 10 km/hour from my rectum. These turds can be seen in many pieces hanging out at the bottom of the toilet. They have a nice green tint to them. When I thought I was done, another, much larger turd shot out with a nice splash-back. The stench hit my nose immediately, and I knew whatever just came out of my ass was not like my usual shits. I looked down between my legs into the shit-bowl in surprise, to stare into the eyes of what looked like a fetus emerging from its cocoon. Take a good, hard look at the photograph, and maybe you can see how my description matches the big floating turd. If you look at the upper region of the fetal-shaped poo, you may notice what looks to be a yellow object stuck in my poo. I have reasons to believe that whatever it is cannot be corn. One being that the corn in corny poos tend to be more dispersed, and not concentrated at a single point. The other reason being that I don't remember eating corn prior to this.

Tuesday - Momma's Lasagna

Some call it beautiful, others call it grotesque, realists call it a pile of shit, and I call it my mom's lasagna. I wonder if it tastes as good the second time around? Perhaps I shall get a mexican to test that? Anyways, as you can see, that's a lot of shit. I do rather enjoy the hybridization of sloppy mush and log-like turds. This shit took me a solid 2 flushes to get down. If you look closely enough, somewhere closer to the right side of the photo, you can actually find the hole where the shit actually goes down! 

Wednesday - The Broken Pretzel

Were you thinking of pretzels when you saw this? Because I was. I was quite surprised when I saw it. It felt like I shot out a single turd, but man was I wrong. To my surprise I saw a series of hook-like logs. Their shape must have caused those skid-marks on the bottom of the toilet bowl as they were being released. Take notice of the red dot on the lower log of shit. I'm sorry if this offends anyone, and I promise you I have nothing against pakis, but does anyone else find it a bit humorous that there's a red dot on a bunch of shit? 

Thursday - Fluffers

This shit is full of foods from the vegetable tempura that I previously ate. It looks almost furry, as if you could pet it and use it for warmth. Wiping grossed even me out. As I'd wipe, I'd look at the toilet paper to check on my anal region's shit concentration to find a fucking green pepper. Something they put in that Japanese food really fucked with my digestion.

Cheers,

- DeuceDropper